Okay guys time for some brutal honesty I am having such a hard time planning my wedding! I know what I want but I also do not like to hurt people's feelings (within reason).
As y'all have seen in previous Wedding Wednesday posts I want a county fair wedding that is fun with cotton candy and games and fair food and no flowers, well people are making it not so fun and easy-going on me.
1. The Mister's evil sister-in-law (whom nobody in the family likes besides her hubby) is talking about how White-trash the wedding will be that she may show up in a denim mini skirt (she is all talk but so mean)
2. The Mister's sweet sweet step-mom is upset that I do not want flowers because she ALWAYS does the flowers
3. My birthmother is not allowed at the wedding and cannot know the date because she will not allow my younger siblings to attend if she finds out the date.
4. I cannot invite my birthmother's dad because he lives out of state and he will tell her about the wedding (this one is truly the hardest and saddest decision I have had to make planning this wedding)
5. Money is an issue (even if only in my mind) my parents are in the process of moving(Dad got transferred to a larger sales region) and even though they will not say money is an issue I am assuming it is, mainly because I do not like people to spend money on me. (I refused lunch/gas money from my parents when I was in high school because I had a job I could do it myself)
6. The Mister's birth mom and step-mom, both whom I love, cannot stand each other. As soon as we told his step-mom we were engaged she asked who was sitting in the mother of the groom's seat? I told her we were not having assigned seating.
7. Too many parents! I love my family with all my heart but I cannot say which set of parents mean more to me than the other, without my dad and momma C I don't know where I would be right now and without David who has raised me since I was 4 I would not have had an alley in hard times or met The Mister. I decided to have both dad's walk me down the aisle to give me away and dance with both at the reception.
Now with all of that being said Momma C just asked if I want to get married on the beach during our vacation at the end of this month, none of the drama listed above would happen but I think about my family what is not going on vacation with us and think it will cause much much more drama. What about my cousin who, since we met when my mother married her uncle, have been planning our weddings as each other's MOH's? What about The Mister's parents, his Dad was going to marry us? What about David and Deidre? What about The Mister's Groomsmen? What about the brother's photo plan of being superheros? What about my dream dress? What about the time my brother and my friend eloped without telling anyone, and when we found out by reading it in the newspaper how furious I was and didn't speak to the for months? How could I do that? How could I run off and marry the man I love without the people that we love, let alone the people who introduced us?
I know that David and Deidre will be relieved that they will not feel obligated to contribute to the wedding, since they are in the process of building a house. I know that Momma C has made an invitation for Josh's parents to stay in the cabin with us during our vacation to go to the wedding. I know that the brother's can take the picture at the reception when we get home. I am confidant that the groomsmen will not care as long as they still get to throw The Mister a party (I love that the Mister & his friends are nerdy, strippers and wild bachelor parties was never their plan). I know that I can find a dress that I will love and cherish forever, because I am easy like that. And I know that Rachel the MOH would get off of work and drive to where ever she needed to be to be there with me. But I still cannot make up my mind. The Mister who is so loving and sweet wants whatever I want because it is my day, but that does not help me at all!
So what do y'all think? Should I deal with a birthmother who will try to crash my wedding, with two other mother's fighting over a seat, with a sister in law being rude, without my grandpa? Or should I be a hypocrite and elope on the beach with half my parents, half my siblings, none of The Mister's friends or family, without my MOH and deal with the repocusions at the reception party when we get home?